Fertility Support

Is Your Dream Of Becoming A Mother Being Overshadowed By Fear And Self-Doubt?

Are you experiencing difficulty getting or staying pregnant?

Do you feel depressed, anxious, and hopeless, wondering if your dreams of having a baby will ever come true?

Fertility struggles are often emotionally, mentally, and physically challenging. If you’re having a hard time getting pregnant, you may feel consumed by a desire to conceive. Maybe you’re distracted, exhausted, and finding it difficult to connect with those around you—especially other friends who have had “easy,” successful pregnancies. Your identity as a woman may feel jeopardized by a self-perception that you’re an inadequate mother and spouse, unable to give your partner a baby.

On the other hand, you may have already conceived yet suffered a miscarriage. Now, a profound sense of grief and sadness has colored your journey to parenthood, and you may be afraid to try again. Exhausted by the rollercoaster of emotions that often accompany the fertility journey, you may be in search of support to help ease the stress and worry.

As a therapist who specializes in trauma and fertility issues, I want to offer my empathy and support as you navigate a path forward. Whether you’re searching for coping skills to help you manage your fertility journey’s ups and downs, guidance about pursuing other options, or just an open, nonjudgmental ear who will listen and validate your experience, I want to help you find hope again.

Infertility Is A Common Yet Hushed Issue

According to the World Health Organization (WHO), one in six people are impacted by infertility globally. [1] In many cases, the rate of infertility increases with age, putting additional pressure on women, in particular, to bear a child by their mid-thirties.

Many of us are not even ready to have a baby until we have established our careers, relationships, and an overall sense of purpose. However, as fertility issues begin to bubble up, we may blame ourselves for waiting too long or prioritizing other things ahead of having a child. It’s a vicious cycle of hope, disappointment, and frustration when miscarrying or struggling to conceive in the first place.

Challenges with getting and staying pregnant introduce a range of painful emotions and questions—am I enough? Will I ever have a baby? When is it time to consider other options besides conceiving naturally? Even though we may know, rationally, not to blame ourselves, many of us can’t help but feel like we did something wrong that has prevented us from achieving the one thing we want most.

Counseling offers a way out of the cycle of anxiety and self-blame. Our sessions together will center around your unique fertility issues as we explore tailor-made solutions for fostering a sense of peace and support in your life. Through therapy, you can get what you need to ensure that your fears and worries about infertility don’t completely overshadow your goals.

As A Therapist Specializing In Trauma And Fertility Issues, I Want To Offer You My Guidance And Support

If you’ve experienced obstacles to getting or staying pregnant, you likely live with some guilt and shame that your body is not working the way you want it to. As a counselor, my job is to create a nonjudgmental atmosphere so that you can increase empowerment and decrease the self-criticism that often accompanies infertility issues. Working together, you can develop lifelong skills for managing tough emotions and making hard decisions.

What To Expect

My fertility support sessions are designed to center each client’s unique goals and experience. For instance, we may identify your long-term objectives around parenthood and the many routes you could take in to reach those objectives. Or, alternatively, we will focus on the acute thoughts and feelings you are having in the moment, especially if you are struggling with the physical and emotional fluctuations involved with fertility treatment. Whatever your needs may be, I want this process to offer meaningful support and concrete skills for making your fertility journey more manageable.

We will do this by paying very close attention to the body’s cues, using Somatic Experiencing and other body-based methods. These approaches aid in nervous system regulation and providing coping strategies that reduce anxiety in real-time. They also slow down the stress response, allowing you to become more mindful of the present moment, fostering a life-changing awareness of what you can and can’t control.

More than anything, however, fertility support is a chance to have someone bear witness to your story. Miscarriage and infertility are hugely common issues yet overlooked by a society that minimizes women’s pain. I want to give you the chance to have your experiences validated so that you can process them and learn to work through challenges. The heartache of infertility is real, but with the right kind of support, you will never be alone in navigating it.

Still Unsure If Counseling Can Help You Overcome Infertility Issues?

I’ve dedicated all of my energy and resources to infertility treatment, and now I don’t even know who I am or what I want anymore. Is this normal?

Yes, it is absolutely normal to become consumed with the desire to conceive when that is something we really want. Treatment—whether via IVF or IUI—makes us become hyper-aware of ourselves and our bodies, often causing us to question everything around us.

Part of fertility support will be identifying the interests and goals you have beyond getting pregnant and becoming a mother in an effort to create a sense of movement in your life. Not only will these explorations make the time move faster, they will also teach you more about who you are and what you have to offer.

My doctors are recommending a donor/other alternatives, but I want to keep trying to conceive. What should I do?

When you are in the thick of treatment, it can be really difficult to determine the best choice forward. Therapy gives you time and space to pause and evaluate all of your options. I will work with you to explore various scenarios and support whatever decision you make on your fertility journey.

Understanding that you have choices and the flexibility to change your mind will help you take the next step forward with clarity.

I’ve been trying to conceive without success for years—I’m worried I am destined to feel sad, hopeless, and inadequate forever.

What you are describing is profound, understandable grief. It’s completely normal to battle with these deeply painful emotions when infertility issues affect your chance of conceiving, but you will not feel this way forever. Yes, there will be times when the sadness will hit you harder than others, but therapy is designed to give you tools to help you move through your emotions.

My approach to fertility-specific counseling gives you permission to cry, scream, punch a pillow, and ask for support—whatever it is that you need to process this pain. And I am confident that by tuning in, listening to the body, and responding to your symptoms in a way that honors your pain as well as your innate strengths, you will have the tools you need to move through this journey with a sense of resilience.

You Are Not Alone

Infertility is a deeply personal and painful struggle; I want to support you in navigating the ups and downs of fertility treatment and the path to parenthood. For more information about infertility counseling or to schedule a session, contact me.

 

[1] https://www.who.int/news/item/04-04-2023-1-in-6-people-globally-affected-by-infertility#:~:text=Around%2017.5%25%20of%20the%20adult,prevalence%20of%20infertility%20between%20regions.